Eyes Wide Shut
by mercurial2010
Summary: Ste knows he's happy with Doug, but one particular morning Ste just can't get Brendan off his mind. A Stendan fic with a nice Doug .
1. Chapter 1

_A/N: Ste POV. __Although there is a little plot, this is mostly just M so be warned. _About three chapters long.

_First posted fic of these guys, so a little nervous. But I'm totally hooked on the dynamic between these two, and if you guys like this there is one more completed fiic awating._

_Please let me know what you guys think :D_

**29/07/2012**

I wake up panting, heated, my sheets tied in knots around my feet. Rubbing my eyes from the dream-bought memories, I lift my phone to my face and immediately regret it – the date only tempting those memories deeper. I really shouldn't have left Doug last night, I groan, realising my body's tension could only have one release. But I did it so that I didn't wreck what we have over memories. I want to maintain some of the sweetness of us, the harmony of 'Stug' as Leanne calls us. I don't want to lose sight of the idyllic peace I reached within our second kiss, first proper kiss. I could have lived in that forever, when Doug broke it I only craved more. I was so happy - he was all I wanted, my business partner, my kids' friend, my boyfriend. It was perfect. So when did I start to lose it? The easy answer is when Brendan was waiting for us after we first made love. I guess there was always something even before that though, but seeing my ex when my body was heated by another was like being exposed to kryptonite or something. When we went back to bed I pushed Doug away, said I was worried about Amy and how she would react to our new landlord; I just couldn't stop seeing _him _though_. _

Dreams that night bought the first lot of heat, wrapped in memories of all the things Brendan used to say. I swear he used to be able to _talk_ me in to coming, he actually did once - I can't stop the cock of my smile as I remember that particular phone call. Every dream since that day, every dream for one month, has bought a new memory of Brendan Brady. They're sometimes crossed with fantasies, things I used to hope for when we were together, like holidays; they're always about sex. The man knew my body even better than I did from the first moment. Even the first time, in that cellar, I was so exposed by him that he could read me like a treasure map for his ministrations. I like to think I'm pretty unpredictable in bed; he's entirely unpredictable in everything. Every single time though he knew exactly what I wanted. Whether it was hard and fast, because I'd been working with him all night and I was about to explode, or slow and deep because it's the perfect way to wake up; or it's clawing and passionate and long drawn-out and full of possession and longing because we'd been apart for too long, because I needed him inside me again but I wanted it to last forever. Like that time a year ago today, the time when he nearly shattered my mind into lust. The time when his actions, as well as his words, told me _what he hadn't_. The time that is beyond the best I've ever had, still. The time I've just dreamed about, I groan into my pillow as my cock pulls at the memories.

Every dream is one of him. To be honest I've done quite well to keep my focus on Doug when we're…y'know. There was a time recently, when they were in Ireland, the fire faded, Brendan Brady was still the fucking star of my dreams, but I didn't wake up with longing. Cheryl had to change all that didn't she though? When she told me he still loved me. He was stood right behind us, he must have heard her say it, I tried to look into his gaze to see what he thought, to convince myself it was a lie, but he barely looked at me. How am I supposed to know what page he's on? I don't even know what planet he comes from! To be honest I'm still expecting some form of pay back for the stunt I managed to play with the Deli. I'm half expecting to see a mortgage bill with his name on it. Or at least some form of con, after all I have cheated him out of eight and a half grand. But I guess one step forward was him becoming the landlord of this place. Triggering a whole lot of new fantasies – because I needed more! So he's still there in control of my life, still in control of my body. He's still separating me from any other guy without even being fucking present.

Shaking myself for my stupidity, I aim for a cooling shower. But this morning, the thirtieth of fucking July, even the rushing water reminds me of him. The time I tempted him into the shower at his, after a long afternoon of fucking; and he complained about how many bottles Cheryl and Lindsey had, until I stepped up behind him, taking his cock in my hands to silence him. God the way his cock looks in my hands, the way it feels. He is so big, but the tiniest slip of my thumb over his head has him begging my name, he makes me feel so God damn powerful. I slam my fist into the shower wall as my cock starts to pull again. Maybe there is only one way of getting rid of this this morning. And maybe it wouldn't be too bad, maybe it would get it out of my system and I could focus on Doug again. I don't see what choice I have, so I run my thumb along the vein on the underside of my cock, and my body purrs in gratitude. I bend down, pouring some Calvin Klien body wash on my hands, and select a memory, like my mind is a jukebox of "times I've been fucked by Brendan". My eyes slip closed as I choose one, it has to be that one doesn't it? It is after all the one year anniversary.

In the shower my hand starts slowly, index finger running up my thigh as I prepare.

He begged me, his eyes were imploring, as his hands clearly shook for their need to touch and possess. The first kiss was mind-blowing; there was no holding back, his tongue deep within me. Controlled by the possession we crashed against the wall to his huff of air.

I wrap my fingers along one ball as I remember the way his body moved so easily from mine. I close my eyes and see that surprise in his gaze as I out-tricked him; I leant in for the second kiss before he even recovered from the first. It wasn't long before he gained control though. His nails dug into my hips as he flung me against the wall. And his teeth grabbed hold of my bottom lip, sucking and grating and causing my loud, unashamed moan.

My teeth take hold of my bottom lip as I walk further into the shower, the water rushing down my body. The tiptoe of the water against my cock is almost too much teasing as from behind my eyelids I can picture him so clearly.

He took the passion he wrapped me in, running his hands down my body and quickly undid my belt, popped my button and pulled the zipper. Within the lust of his kiss, and the passion caused by a month's separation, his touch released a whimper. I can still clearly see the fucking smile that spread quickly across his lips. The sight he left my clinging onto, before he was on his knees in front of me, my trousers and boxers half way down my legs.

I wipe my tongue over my stinging lip as I remember the way he'd liked his lips. I recall that look of pure focus in his eyes as he practically looked heat into my cock. The gaze in his eyes was like he was about to start work on some form of masterpiece.

Eased by the shower gel, I allow my hand to work slowly over my member. It was the first time he took me into his mouth. I didn't know if he'd done it on other guys before, but God was he good at it. Practically deep throating me in the first thrust. My hands slid all over the wallpaper beneath his stairs as I searched for any hold, anything to cling onto, anything to stop my knees from trembling as his tongue and lips spread fire in every muscle. His eyes fixed mine, the look unreadable. His hands grabbed for mine and left them rested against his head. My fingers drifted through the strands of his thick hair and his lips almost pulled at the corners.

Fuck! I almost slide across the shower at the forgotten power of that image - Brendan's lips stretched over my cock, the corners tilting into that moustache as he fucking grinned. His eyes were fixed purely on me, as he watched impatient for my climax.

Impulsively my lips whimper his name into the rushing water, wetly so it's mainly vowels because I'm that turned on. I'm so glad Amy is out with the kids, I can be as loud as I want. As my hand wraps the width of me I moan and that seems to spark a deeper fire inside me, so I do it again. My hand is tighter as I keen, head up, droplets of water play against my parted lips.

My licentious mind recalls the feel of that ridiculous moustache against my balls as he fucking swallowed me. I was in so deep, and my mind almost cracked under the pinpricks of moustache. I use my free hand to rub a tightened ball.

Eventually, he slipped me out, slowly, so I felt fucking massive, almost completely. And then he suckled the head. His tongue played with the skin. It was a trick I'd done on him a million times, and I knew then how evil it was because Jesus did I want to come, but it just wasn't enough.

I bite my lips to trap a laugh as I play against the head of my cock. The skin is so sensitive, it's almost too much to bear, but anything to make the memories more real. My hand shakes as I force myself to keep up the tease, and I know how close I am. So I skip ahead in the memory, I only have a few seconds.

In reality he made me fuck his mouth for hours. That smile only getting wider. Every time I almost came he pulled away, suckling the head, causing the flames of climax to chill only a little. In the end I had to beg him to fuck me. I needed him inside me so badly. He moaned as he drew his mouth away. I knew he wanted to taste me. He was doing everything to please me though, everything for me. And if I insisted we fucked, we fucked.

We fucked on the sitting room floor, by that table. And either he had got larger, or I had got so used to Noah's dick I had gotten tighter. Either way he stretched me completely. So, it was like the first time; every pull from his cock felt like I was being rocked by the fucking ocean.

With the memory so tight my arse cries at the lack of attention. I place a finger inside myself. And my body purrs. Impulsively his name falls loud from my lips.

"Brendaaan."

"Steven," my eyebrows tighten in confusion as his voice sounds so real. It's weird, I don't remember replaying the sound of his voice, and it's even odder because his voice sounded close, like it came from the same room. Like it came from the same room. My eyes slam open. Shit.


	2. Chapter 2

_A/N: Thank you so much for all the wonderful responses to the last chapter, you guys are awesome. This is pure sex, I feel we need this after the lack of Stendan but the abundance of topless Brendan, even Walkers failing in his duties haha!_

_Enjoy :D_

_And remember reviews are love._

"Steven," he says my name only once. It's not exactly a question, although it's tinged with a hint of doubt. There's also a tone of anger, a threat behind it, like 'don't you dare make yourself come whilst remembering me when it's clear I still want you'. My name mainly rolls with possession though, like it used to when he knew for certain I was all his.

I don't question why he's here, or how he's here, the landlord keys grasped between his fingers. I move quickly, curse out loud, turn the shower off and cover myself with my hand. Although I'm so turned on right now my cocks barely hidden, and it's pointless anyway, cos it's clear he's been there for a while. And besides he's already tasted every inch of my body.

He reads the denial in my eyes, before his gaze maps slowly down my dripping body, taking in every inch. Maybe he still knows just how much I belong to him. As his eyes fixate over my hand I feel my cock stir in deprivation. I have no self-restraint at all. I am so sordidly weak just the power of his gaze is enough to have me dying to come.

When he greets my gaze again, his eyebrow raises, asking me to deny what's so clear before his eyes. And I realise there's no possible explanation for my state right now and the fact his name has just passed loud and clear from my lips. Even if there was though, would I really want to? My body is so tense, all I want to do is have him show me all the ways I can relax. In answer I reach to turn the shower back on. He smiles, clearly reading the instruction, but stands still asking me silently if I'm sure. I nod, and swallow the nerves as I drop my hand from my member. His eyes flip straight to my cock, and I feel my balls draw slightly tighter.

"Fuck," is the only word he says before he slides out of his shoes, and starts to remove his clothes.

I watch spell-bound as the pop of each button exposes more of that chest; he's even more perfect than my memories. He's worked out this last year, his muscles tighter than before.

Naked apart from his boxers he stands proud for me, letting my gaze drink in every inch. That pale skin, those tattoos, the dark scattering of hair pulling so temptingly into the tight white cotton. His thumbs pose ready in the waist band, stoking the passion with impatience. He widens his eyes, waiting for some move from me, asking for me to tell him how much I want him. But talking would be a mistake, I know my first words need to be about Doug, and I want this too badly to finish it yet. So instead I wrap my fingers around my cock once again, pulling hard. A tease in my eyes - _If you're not going to join the party Bren, you can just watch_.

His growl carries through me, licking those flames. He bends down quickly, removing the fabric, showing me exactly how deeply I've affected him.

God he's fucking incredible. Every inch of him. It's not long before he's with me in the shower, his entire body pressed into mine. He stretches my arms up above my head, holding my wrists against the wet porcelain. With his thumb he unhooks my bottom lip from my teeth, I wasn't even aware I was biting it. And then he kisses me, deep and consuming, like I'm made of oxygen and he needs me to breathe. His tongue trails over the back of my teeth, causing that long deep moan only he has ever released in me. And he pulls back smiling.

"That was some show Steven, need a little help with the ending?" He asks, before he's on his knees in front of me, that wonderful arse bobbing, as he shows me that memories aren't a substitute for the real thing.

I barely have time to wonder how he knows that was the memory I was enjoying, before he has me coming, shattering into him. The feeling of him swallowing every inch strengthens my climax. He holds my slackened member in his mouth for a little longer, until I thread my fingers through his hair and call him up to me with a sigh of his name shortened by my tongue.

As he stands, he opens his mouth under the faucet, drinking a little of the water. His eyes fixed on me the whole time, the expression focused but unreadable, and I squirm under the intensity. That's what he does to me; he takes me to cloud nine and abandons me, so I question how it's possible to be too blissed out to feel scared.

He takes a step toward me, and I feel the presence of him against my hip. So fucking hard.

"OK?" He asks, but I can no longer think of how I am. All I can think is how he is, and how good he can make me feel.

"Fuck me," are the only words I can speak. I hope it comes out powerful and domineering like an order, in reality it probably sounds more like a whimper, the ash of the last climax bursting into flames under his gaze.

There's a tiny lick of a smile across his lips, a flicker of bliss in his gaze and then he's bending down to pick up the shower gel. I turn around to give him better access, but he blocks my movements, nails digging into my hips.

"No, I need to watch you."

When he's standing again, he hooks my chin with his thumb and presses his lips to mine. This kiss is slow and wonderful, heaves keens from my soul and dances over my mouth long after his presence leaves. His forehead rests against mine, as he looks deep into my eyes. I gasp as I feel his finger against my arse, stroking around, before pressing inside, the water and gel acting as lube as he enters me knuckle deep with one thrust. I tilt my head back against the pleasure a long hard keen emitting my lips.

"Fuck Steven, those little sounds you make, I can't wait any longer - I need to be inside you."

I barely have time to ask how this is going to work, standing in the shower, before it's like he's lifted me up with one arm, the other hand guiding his cock into my body.

At first, as he enters me, my entire body burns, every cell catching on fire in a way that I've missed for so long. Rolling quickly on the waves of that bliss is a need to have him deeper, firmer, harder inside me. I hook my hips around his, hugging him to me, and the small shift seems to pull him in deeper. My vision sparks as he brushes against my prostrate, and I release his name into the shower in one long exhale.

"Brendan."

His fingers tug the hair at the nape of my neck, pulling my gaze down to his.

"Shut up." He breathes in a warning. It's impossible to miss the meaning, the look in his eyes showing me exactly what my voice does to him.

So I smile, and will my voice to come louder, "fuck Bren, you feel fucking amazing."

He tugs my hair tighter, pulling my mouth down to his.

"You need to shut up. I swear I'll come just by listening to you." He exhales hot against my lips.

He takes my kiss as deep and searing and desperate; the pricks of his moustache burning. He moans as my tongue battles with his, and I smile, _same to you_, I think.

Our posture is so tight that our strokes our shallow. We're both so on fire though, that we're quickly panting, desperate for release. He makes the rhythm fast. The kiss lasts. I jerk my hips in time with his thrusts. And smile as he whimpers. He pulls back. His fingers are still in my hair. He controls my posture. Keeping my face just a few inches from his. I can't see anything but his eyes darkened for me, his jaw tensed against the pleasure. His thrusts inside me get shorter, quicker. Every one tight against my prostate. He loses a gasp and I suck it between my lips. He leans closer. Fuck. I feel my cock pull between my groin and his tight abdomen with every thrust. I gasp, loudly. He bites my lip, hard. A warning.

"I need you to come with me, Steven." He cries. There's doubt, as though it's not possible. As though he hasn't wrapped every cell in fire.

"Please." He adds that word and paints memories around us. I see the anniversary spark in his eyes as clearly as in mine.

I wish I could close my eyes, fling myself into bliss. But I can't hide from the intensity in his licentious gaze. So I cling to him, nipping my nails into his shoulders, feeling the hot, wet, smooth skin dent under my grasp. His jerks within me start, our rhythm faltering. I squeeze my muscles around his cock, pulling him out further.

"Jesus Christ, Steven." The way his tongue caresses my name is my undoing; and as I feel my seed slash hard between us he fills me completely.


End file.
